Clackamas Classic

June 14, 2008

Eastmoreland Golf Course (Portland, OR)

Format:  two-man best ball

Portland, OR -- The Tailgate State tour convened at the familiar setting of Eastmoreland municipal golf course for what turned out to be one of the oddest, most surreal events in the organization's short but glorious history.  It was a day filled with high hopes and the emotional return of a former tour veteran but would ultimately end in anger and controversy.

Oregon's cold and wet spring finally gave way to a beautiful, sun-splashed day and moods were elevated as the players prepared for the task at hand.  A late entry by two boys hailing from the cultural mecca of Corvallis ("Team Jason") meant a full field of sixteen players would compete in the Clackamas Classic, known to be one of the better organized and well run tournaments on the tour. 

Though neither had much experience in the competitive golf arena, the two Jasons (Quick and Phillips) started fast in the first group of the day by getting to four strokes under par after the first three holes.  Completing the first foursome was "Team Hoagland".  The brothers-in-law made an unfortunate double bogey on the first hole, a mistake that wouldn't be erased until they finally broke through with an eagle on hole number nine. 

The second group was made up of "Team Killing the Tour" and "Team Defending Champions", both of whom would be expected to contend for the Clackamas Classic title, if only because of their propensity for accumulating points.  Surprisingly, both squads made bogey on the first hole and it was becoming obvious that the day was going to be slow, tense and challenging. 

Eyes became moist and many in the field had a lump in their throats when Kevin Harris' name was called at the tee.  As one of the founding members of the Tailgate State Tour, Harris has long been an energizing force for his teammates and competitors alike with witty repartee and a zest for living.  After a self-imposed exile to Beaverton for soul searching and personal exploration, Harris' appearance at the golf course looking clean-cut, fit and healthy was a welcome sign to the field, but more importantly, his partner.  Alas, the team titled "Why Not Us?" answered their own question rather quickly with consecutive double bogeys at the fourth and fifth holes that effectively ended their chance at the title.

The final pairing had a familial theme as the Tyvands and the Wolds charged down the first fairway.  Their progress would end there as Eastmoreland's deplorable policy of putting as many people onto the golf course as possible meant that teams would be stacked up on the second tee and throughout much of the day.  A seemingly disinterested beverage attendant merely had to park her cart at the third tee to generate business as up to three foursomes were often waiting for their turn to continue play.

"Team Jason" took the lead after the first nine holes with an impressive score of nine strokes under par.  "Team Killing the Tour" made the turn in 30 strokes with "Team Tyvand" another stroke back at 31.

Both the pace of play and the consumption of beer sped up on the final nine holes.  "Team Jason" had bogeys on holes 13 and 14 to give hope to many in the field, including "Team Killing the Tour" who were tied for the lead at eight under par after Tommy Berry's birdie (net eagle) on the eleventh hole.  With Jim Tyvand chipping into the hole on seemingly every opportunity, "Team Tyvand" got as low as seven strokes below par before a bogey at 13 stopped their momentum.  A birdie (net eagle) by Lance Meyerink at hole 11 moved "Team Tardy" to six strokes under par but they would ultimately limp in with bogeys on 12, 14 and 17.

With play close to completion and nerves on edge, chaos erupted on the fifteenth hole.  Golf carts were scattered over the next two holes with no indication of who was playing where on the course.  Dave Charbonneau stood 230 yards from the 15th tee but without golf clubs, cart nor his partner nearby, and seemed to be looking for an errant tee shot he might have hit on the 16th hole or possibly examining some of Eastmoreland's old growth timber.  Emotionally drained, frustrated and exhausted, "Team Why Not Us?" took to the tee and Harris hit his patented high fade tee shot that whistled past Charbonneau's ear before landing in the left rough.  "Team Killing the Tour" stood in a spot that appeared to be just short of the 15th green so Jeff Albright took aim with his often unpredictable driver, severely doubting he could hit the ball the 330 yard distance that appeared to be between him and the competitors ahead.  Unfortunately, he connected with a high drawing tee shot that came within yards of Berry and his teammate, the ever easygoing Dann Sonne.

An obviously discombobulated Berry proceeded to hit his next two chip shots a total of ten yards before launching into a tirade at the group behind.  Once completing the hole and putting out for double bogey, an enraged Berry continued his verbal assault at all parties within earshot and furiously shoved the flagstick into the cup at a 45 degree angle as a sign of his disgust.  A poor approach shot left Albright underneath a tree to the left of the green but he proceeded to use the misaligned flagstick to carom his ball into the hole for a birdie and the only highlight of the day for "Team Why Not Us?"  By this point, everyone nearby was confused and alarmed and the matter was not aided by Jim Rader's accusations that someone had been surreptitiously taking clubs from his golf bag.  "Team Killing the Tour" had more choice words as they stomped down the 16th fairway, Rader found his missing golf clubs in some tall grass and one of the most bizarre scenes ever witnessed in a Tailgate State Cup event was over.

Emotions eventually calmed, handshakes were exchanged and the matter of winning the 2008 Clackamas Classic was back at hand.  Aided by Tal Wold's birdie (net double eagle) on the 13th hole and Jason Wold's birdies on 17 and 18, "Team Wold" finished their round in 63 strokes and for a moment, appeared to be the champions.  Nearby, "Team Jason" and "Team Hoagland" were huddled over their cards in an attempt to total their scores.  The rest of the field stood to the side, trying to overhear their final tally.  Quick announced that his team was only six strokes under par while his subdued partner calmly sipped a beer. 

"No, wait!", exclaimed Brendan McMullen, "You're ten under par!"  Another huddle ensued as a confused field of competitors looked on.  The cards were examined again, audited by other players and ultimately, "Team Jason" was declared the winner with a score of 62 in the first Tailgate State Cup tour win for Phillips and the second for Quick.

Thankfully, the tour takes a one month break before resuming with the Rader Roundup in mid-July.  Most players will agree that the pressure and intensity of the Tailgate State Cup is wearing on them.  The battle at the top of the leader board appears to be a two man race at this point between current Cup holder Jason Wold and fiesty challenger Tommy Berry.  Many competitors have now played in the four events required to optimize their point totals and can drop poor scores with their results in future events.